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Google to Map Oceans In 3-D

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted May 2nd 2008 at 10:27AM


Google likes to map things. Big things. Like the earth. And the sky.

It's completely logical then that it would want to map the ocean, which is also quite large. Which brings us to Google Ocean, the probable name for Google's hypothetical nautical juggernaut.

Google is collaborating with a myriad of oceanography experts to plan the eventual creation of a 3-D oceanographic map that would provide a view of the deep blue sea unlike any other. Though similar in many ways to typical topographical maps, Google's would incorporate much more data, from specific shipwreck sites to zooming and panning tools that would allow people to navigate formerly unexplored areas of the ocean. Grids and information from various oceanographic institutes would also be included, lending even more scientific and academic clout.

As with any technology as expansive as this, there are issues that affect both security and privacy. However, the potential benefits that may come from such an ambitious project leave us, quite honestly, drooling. [Source: Cnet]




New Maserati Lamp By Lumina

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted May 1st 2008 at 4:58PMBreaking News

The image

Maserati is known for producing heart-achingly gorgeous cars. We think that having a Maserati in the driveway would be the perfect finishing touch for anyone planning a life of supreme opulence.

Maserati seems to disagree. The driveway is too far. It sees itself in your living room. Sort of.

Maserati has teamed with Italian fixture manufacturer Lumina to produce the first ever Maserati lamp. The best way to describe the lamp is that it's a single light source sandwiched by two rectangular pieces of steel. The famed Maserati grille has been laser cut into the pleces of metal, allowing elegant light to billow forth. To control the temperature of light, users simply touch the Maserati trident in the center of the lamp.

This lamp is beautiful and exclusive. Just like the cars. [Source: Autoblog]

Teacher Fired For Viewing Pornography Sues District

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Apr 21st 2008 at 8:05AM


A former Cedarburg, Wisconsin teacher, fired for viewing porn while on the job in 2006, is back, $9 million lawsuit in hand.

Robert Zellner was fired after school officials concluded that he had viewed porn, at his computer, on a Sunday, for 67 seconds. In the lawsuit, Zellner's attorney claims that the disgraced teacher was making sure that access to adult material wasn't available to students. The complaint goes on to allege that the school district violated Zellner's free speech.

The whole free speech thing probably isn't going to carry much weight, what with buzzwords flying around like porn, "blonde" and children(read the full article and you'll get the blonde reference). However, the elapsed time that Zellner spent viewing the page/s does raise some eyebrows, at least from a comedic standpoint. What pleasure could he have derived from 67seconds of porn?

Zellner may be lying, he may be a pervert and it may be a blessing that he can no longer find work as a teacher in Wisconsin. Anywhere.

On the other hand, an uptight school system may have ruined an honest man's life and, more importantly, his reputation. [Source: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, via Fark]


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Texting May Help Improve Parent-Teen Relationship -- Duh!

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Apr 17th 2008 at 5:53PM


Samsung Mobile recently conducted a survey of 500 families with teenagers ages 13-19 years old to determine the effect, if any, that text messaging has on the parent - teen relationship. Of those parents surveyed, more than half said that they communicated with their teen/s via text and that their relationship with said teen/s was better off because of it. Whew, we're sure that's a relief to Samsung Mobile.

Look. Simply put, this is a marketing ploy. The clinical psychologist that narrates the video (her last name is Loonin, we kid you not) is both annoying and unnecessary. Communication between teens and parents is essential? Get out!!!!

There is no doubt that cell phones are creating new ways for parents to connect with the teens that resent and rebel against them. That is a very good thing. But please remember that the art of parenting has been around far longer than mobile phones, and talking in person, if an option, is still pretty effective if done correctly. [Source: GeekSugar]

What Makes Gossip Girl's Leighton Meester Tick (and Type)?

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Apr 14th 2008 at 12:06PMFeatured Story




Leighton Meester is beautiful, successful, and, like all celebrities with an ounce of ambition, inseparable from her BlackBerry. These days, Meester can be seen personifying teen angst in the popular show 'Gossip Girl' where she plays Blair Waldorf, a young socialite with a healthy appetite for the spotlight.

Though primarily known for her aforementioned role, Meester has been around for years, having appeared in everything from 'CSI Miami' to last year's indie flick 'Flourish' and the just-releasted 'Remember the Daze,' in which she plays a -- surprise, surprise -- a high-school student. When she isn't on set or closing deals, she is recording music. Golly do we feel inadequate.

Okay, we get it, she is multi-talented and destined for greatness. There are, however, topics of extreme importance that must be discussed to realize the true depths of Leighton Meester. We tracked her down to find out what really makes her tick. And type.




What gadgets do you always bring with you to the set for down-time?

I bring my iPod and my BlackBerry. I listen to my iPod in my trailer while I'm getting my hair and makeup done.


What cell phone do you have right now and what do you love/hate about it?

I have a BlackBerry. I love it because I can get business done anywhere and anytime.


Who's the last person you sent a text message to and what was it about?

The last message I sent was to my friend, Jess about answering these questions!


Where do you go pretty much every time you get online?

I go to CNN.com....Boring!


What annoys you most about your iPod, cell phone, or laptop (or any other gadget)?

My cell phone doesn't get great service on both coasts, which is hard because I am constantly traveling back and forth from Los Angeles to New York.


Name one thing you wish your iPod/cellphone/laptop could do that it doesn't do now?

I wish my phone had a button on it that could unlock my car door, because I usually have it in my hand then anyway.


What upcoming gadget can you not wait to get your hands on?

A cell phone that gets great service on both coasts.


You're stranded on a desert island: What gadget do you bring?

If I were stranded on a desert island I would probably want a ham radio so that I could be rescued!


What's the most-played song or artist on your iPod?

Technically, the most played song is 'Girl from the North Country' by Bob Dylan.


BlackBerry, Sidekick, or Treo?

BlackBerry


Do you have or are you planning to get an iPhone?

No


What's the longest time you've ever spent playing a video game in one sitting and what game was it?

Recently, I have spent some long nights playing rock band.


Mac or PC?

Mac. Why not?

New Chip to Let iPods Hold 500,000 Songs

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Apr 14th 2008 at 8:41AMBreaking News


You're not going blind and that's not a typo.

In the current issue of Science, researchers at IBM unveiled a new type of media storage technology they say could give MP3 players the ability to store around 500,000 songs or 3,500 movies.

O M G.

It's called "racetrack" memory and it involves using the "spin" of an electron to store data. More explicitly, the researchers were able to "store data in columns of magnetic material arranged on the surface of a silicon wafer. The information moves around the columns at high speed, giving the technology its racetrack name."

The technology is similar to flash memory in that it has no moving parts and is unlikely to mechanically malfunction. Unlike flash memory however, it will not wear out after a few thousand uses. Oh yeah, and it's faster. A lot faster.

The biggest, baddest MP3 player on the market right now is the iPod Classic. It has 160-gigabytes (GB) of memory and holds up to 40,000 songs . We know what you're thinking. Weak Sauce. Don't throw away that old POS yet though, since devices boasting "racetrack" memory won't be in stores until around 2018. And yes, we know that's poop.



From Science (via TimesOnline and Engadget)







Tracey Ullman As Arianna Huffington Spoofs Blog World

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Apr 12th 2008 at 5:48PMFeatured Story

Tracy Ullman has been making people laugh for a very, very long time. Her ability to stay current, and utterly hilarious, is impressive by anyone's standards. Her new show, 'State of the Union,' is fertile ground for her unorthodox humor and, man, does she capitalize on her most recent renaissance.

One of the most priceless examples of Ullman's comic genius is an impersonation of Arianna Huffington, veteran pundit, uber blogger and founder of the Huffington Post. Portraying a very Zsa-Zsa-Gabor-like Huffington, Ullman accepts a Web award for best female blogger and quickly lets fly with a tech savvy, Ann Coulter-frying speech. You truly owe it to yourself to watch the entire clip, but here are a few excerpts to wet your appetite.

On her fellow nominee Ann Coulter:

"I know I said in my Tuesday blog that you are blond bitch who should have her Youtubes tied, but seriously I meant it."

On the merits of her IT guy:

"You never 'Force Quit' on me, even when I repeatedly say that you have performed an illegal operation."

You get the idea. Now go enjoy.

From GeekSugar

Computer Experts Stage Protest in Oslo Against Microsoft

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Apr 12th 2008 at 4:51PM


Oslo, Norway.

There are no words to describe the carnage that ensued after the International Standards Organization adopted Microsoft's document format as the international standard. What an aptly named organization. But we Digress.

Mayhem! Chaos! 60 data experts standing in the rain! In Oslo!

What? Oh.

The peaceful protest, or "diet riot" as we like to call it, was held in response to Microsoft's Office Open XML being recognized as the world standard for document formatting. Opponents claim that Microsoft utilizes its power to beat down competitors and enslave consumers to Microsoft compatible programs. The Majority of the protesters preferred ODF, a document format that is compatible with various software companies programs and seen by many as a less dictatorial option.

In response, Microsoft claimed that they should all just shut up and stop being sore loser meany-heads. Or at least protest in Stockholm. Which is in Sweden.

This wasn't actually a riot, if you didnt get that already. Just checking. The Picture up top was a joke. Its not even raining in the picture. [Source: TheAge]


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For Sale: Videos of Wal-Mart Execs In Drag

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Apr 10th 2008 at 7:04PM



Wal-Mart is not happy.

Flagler Productions Inc., a production company hired by Wal-Mart in the 1970s to film company events, has begun selling the videos to, well, whoever wants them. The videos, of which there are thousands, contain everything from company executives dressing in drag to, let's say, less than pleasant rants on the merits of organized labor.

The videos are of particular interest to attorneys involved in the lawsuit against Wal-Mart on behalf of 1.6 million women that claim widespread sexual discrimination. One video shows the founder of Wal-Mart, Ed Walton, admitting that efforts to train and promote women had been unsatisfactory at best.

In a statement to ABC News, Wal-Mart responded to this banana-hammockery in a eerily calm manner with the following:

"Needless to say, we did not pay Flagler Productions to tape internal meetings with this aftermarket in mind. It's definitely an unusual business model on their end, and we can't imagine too many other clients will be eager to pay for this service."

Creepy.

We are not fooled by the soothing tone of this politically correct statement and fully expect every employee of Flagler Productions to be utterly destitute within the next 48 hours.


From ABC





Life-Sized Inflatable iPod Boombox Could Scare Kids

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Apr 9th 2008 at 10:30AM


Quick, imagine everything that you love about your iPod. The small size, the style, the convenience -- all fantastic attributes right? Well, imagine a device that's exactly the opposite and you are left with the iBig Box.

The iBig Box is a very large inflatable boombox that has an iPod dock and felt control buttons. It is large and bulky and completely defeats the purpose of owning modern technology. (Sorry, but it's true.) Did we mention that it costs $60? There have been worse ideas, but $60?

There is a chance that people will buy this to impress and/or placate their small children, but we think hiring a clown to perform would have the same emotionally-scarring effect. Enjoy, and you're welcome.


From Engadget


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Drunk Newlyweds Tasered and Jailed

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Apr 8th 2008 at 11:47AMBreaking News


Ah, wedding night. A magical evening filled with frivolity and passion, and, evidently, non-lethal electrocution via taser.

Sigh.

A Vallejo, California couple was thrown in jail on their wedding night after a house party was repeatedly broken up by police. Neighbors reported hearing loud music late into the night and the party eventually headed outside.

The groom, evidently overjoyed by the prospect of everlasting marital bliss, became a bit too animated for police. He was treated to a healthy dose of electrical current after he stripped off his shirt and advanced toward officers with balled up fists. He got tasered. On his wedding night. Well played, sir.

Not to be outdone, the bride was also arrested for public intoxication. Both of them spent the evening in Solano County Jail.

We are aware that the economy is not at its strongest right now, but seriously, wasn't there an easier way to score a cheap room for the night? Here's hoping the rest of their lives go more smoothly than the first 24 hours of their marriage.


From CNN


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Video Game Encourages Kids to Brush Their Teeth

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Apr 8th 2008 at 8:02AM


Dental hygiene is crucial to a child's development. Unfortunately, it sounds like a scary African scavenger and is absolutely no fun. Thankfully, researchers at the National Taiwan University have devised a truly fun way to protect your children's chompers.

This is how their contraption works:

First, an LED module loaded with three LED's is mounted on the end of the toothbrush handle. The module is tracked by a Web camera that has been mounted on top of whatever mirror your child brushes in front of. The camera uses software to track the movements of the toothbrush and syncs them up with a cartoon version -- displayed on an LCD screen -- -- of teeth being scrubbed clean.

So, the "game" isn't really that hard or even much of a game at all, but studies showed that kids using the system brushed twice as well as those without it.


From Engadget


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Man Gets $2.6 Million for Pizza.com Domain Name

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Apr 7th 2008 at 2:05PM


There are easy ways to make loads of money. We swear. All you have to do is go back in time and buy up a bunch of domain names and then auction them off, well, now. Simple right?

A U.S. man just sold the domain name pizza.com for $2.6 million to an anonymous buyer.

Chris Clark, of North Potomac, Maryland, registered the domain name in 1994. He had originally hoped that the domain name would secure a contract with a pizza company for his consulting company. Surprisingly, it didn't work out, so he sold his businesses, but maintained the domain name for $20 a year. Now his forethought is being rewarded in a huge, huge way.

Clark got the idea after the domain name vodka.com sold for $3 million. He opened the auction on March 27th. After an initial bid of $100, the price jumped to $2.6 million a few weeks later. In a post-sale interiew, Clark expressed regret for not having purchased more domain names while the internet was still young.

Buddy, you and us both.


From BBC



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Apple Says It's Officially Number One Music Retailer in U.S.

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Apr 4th 2008 at 7:38PM

Move over Wal-Mart, Apple is the number one music retailer in the U.S. For Now.

Apple has started 2008 with a bang, and though there is a lot of '08 to go, they are claiming victory over traditionally unhip and creepy Wal-Mart. The claim is based on total music sales from January and February of 2008. Wal Mart was the overall winner last year, and could still claim the crown this year. That didn't stop Apple from boasting about their success.

We can't blame them. Since it was first launched five years ago, Itunes has amassed 50 million customers. It has sold over 4 billion songs and maintains the world's largest music catalog of 6 million songs.

From Engadget

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Breast Massage Robot Provides Health and Cosmetic Benefits

by Peter Mychalcewycz, posted Mar 31st 2008 at 4:11PM



Wei Wang of BUBBY Robot Technologies wants you to help him take care of your breasts. Confused? Don't be. He has created a new massage robot specifically for women's breasts, and he swears you won't be disappointed.

The portable Breast Massage Robot fits various size breasts and costs a fraction of a traditional breast massage. The massager consists of a girdle-like circular garment with two mechanical arms that reach around to the breasts in a hugging motion. The arms, which have saucer shaped "hands," plod and knead as instructed by the robot's owner via various speed and pressure settings. The potential benefits of this device are not to be chuckled at, with various sources linking proper breast massage with an assortment of health benefits.

The business plan that Mr. Wei has set forth for investors is, however, open game for a hearty, hearty laugh. In the aforementioned plan, Wei professes enthusiastically that the Massage Robot will accomplish all of, but not limited to, the following:

1. Girls who are reaching puberty and hope to improve the growth of breast
2. Women who are under pressure and want to relax themselves.
3. Women who want to improve their sex activities.
4. Women who want to have pretty breasts.

The list goes on and on and on. It is truly unbelievable how anyone hasn't invested in such a wonder of modern technology. Perhaps a different marketing scheme would benefit a product that actually might have some genuine benefits. For now, the public is left gawking at the absolute absurdity inherent within the plan itself.

Personally, after reading the entire proposal, the only thing we can remember is the name of his company, which is BUBBY (pronounced BOOOBIE).


From BUBBY Robot Technologies via Crave


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