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Hate the Body Scanners? Protect Your Privates With Radiation-Blocking Briefs

by Matthew Zuras on November 22, 2010 at 12:07 PM

rocky flats gear underwearNo matter what side of the body-scanner fence you call home -- the Righteous Nation of Hands Off Our Junk, or the Republic of Poor TSA Workers Forced to Look at and/or Fondle Your Bits -- you should now know that the saturation point has been reached (even before National Opt Out Day!), and that we have entered the realm of self-parody. How can we tell? Well, now the tinfoil hat inventors have jumped into the fray, and one Colorado man has created body-scanner-shielding undies. Yup.

If you're concerned about the TSA getting a gander at the lumpy gray relief of your naked hulk, throw on a pair of these underoos appliquéd with fig leaves over your sexy regions. Jeff Buske, the owner of Rocky Flats Gear and maker of the super-undies, says that the lead-free blocking material isn't about politics, but about health. His website claims the underwear blocks or diminishes "Alpha and Beta radiation," "T-Wave/Tera hertz radiation from remote strip cameras," and "radiation from back scatter x-ray machines." If Buske is so concerned about health, why didn't he make shields for your heart or your head?

Offering single briefs for men and women for $20 to $25, Buske is also hawking bra inserts, children's versions, and even three- and five-packs for those busy travelers and genital radiation paranoiacs. Of course, you could always choose to opt out of the body scan entirely, and get a professional feel-up by a gloved TSA worker. Happy holidays!

Tags: airport, BodyScanners, JeffBuske, lolz, MillimeterWave, privacy, RockyFlatsGear, top, travel, tsa, wearables

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