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Google Search Suggestions Show Popular, Moronic Queries

by Leila Brillson on November 10, 2009 at 03:24 PM

The Brits are great, some of our favorite people. Well-dressed, polite, fabulous musicians, but perhaps a bit too hard on the average individual. In a recent investigation on the nature of humanity, CNET.co.uk decided to see what popular searches Google offered when prompted by simple questions, and the findings were bleak. Using 'Google Suggest,' the auto-fill feature that predicts text as it's being input into the search query, suggested that most Googlers looking for answers are, in fact, stupid. The phrases entered were examples like "Am I going..." and the Google-prompted response would be, "Into Labour?" (See, British spelling). CNET's snide answer: "Is there a brand-new human poking out of your lower body? If yes, then congratulations, you're going into labour. More accurately, you're already in it."

Fair enough; people who use the Internet can be quite daft. But that's the joy on the Web, having immediate answers to questions you might feel to, er...stupid to ask. A lost soul could type in an absurd question, like "Am I having a heart attack?" and quickly get a plethora of responses. Sure, typing in "Why can't I..." reveals the silly-sounding "Own a Canadian," but actually hearkens back to a Dr. Laura radio program. Typing, "Why would a..." in the UK Google box is finished by "...married man cheat?" but on the regular .com, we see "...a change in ph cause a protein to denature" as the top result, followed by "...a cat stop using a litter box?" Honestly, both are questions that should be answered immediately. (Note: Search results are based in popularity, so perhaps there has been a spike in pH changes recently.)

Let's be real, CNET. Searching "Can you drink...?" is just asking for trouble. Nothing smart ever came out of consulting the Net on drinking habits, and even the most sophisticated has, at one point, pondered over whether or not urine could be consumed. You know, just to be sure. To further prove our faith in human beings, we typed in, "What would happen if...?" and the first Google suggestion was, "...I hired two private investigators to follow each other?" Good question, Google. One for the ages. [From: CNET.co.uk]

Tags: britain, funny, google, google suggest, GoogleSuggest, search, search engines, search terms, SearchEngines, SearchTerms, stupid, top

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