How to 'Memorialize' the Facebook Pages of the Recently Deceased
Dealing with the death of a friend or relative is never easy. But in the era of social networking, many are taking to the Internet, grieving and paying their last respects by writing to the Facebook pages of the deceased. However, Facebook has never officially decided what should happen to a person's profile when he or she dies -- until now.
Using a touching personal anecdote, Facebook employee Max Kelly blogged about the site's new 'memorializing' feature, which allows people to share memories, and ensures the privacy of both the deceased and his or her family. Shortly after starting at Facebook, Kelly's best friend and co-worker died in a bicycling accident four years ago. At the time, Facebook was a small community of employees, which meant the death took a large toll on each person. Kelly writes in the post that sharing memories helped everyone through the event. "It was a big blow to me personally, but it also was difficult for everyone at Facebook," he says. "As a company, we shared our grief, and for many people it was their first interaction with death."
But questions arose from this death, too. Like, what will happen to this person's Facebook profile? From there, Kelly and others began developing the idea of "memorializing" profiles in order to let people share their memories of the deceased.
According to CNET News, in order to 'memorialize' a profile, a user must prove that he or she had a relationship with the departed person, which can be done by providing the person's e-mail address or date of birth. Next, you'll need to send Facebook a link to a news article or obituary confirming the death. This is necessary, presumably, to discourage pranksters from 'memorializing' still-living friends.
Once this is confirmed, personal information, like telephone numbers, will be removed, and the profile will be hidden from anyone that isn't a confirmed friend. This way, only those close to the deceased can visit the page and write on his or her wall. To protect against hackers, the profile will be locked from all log-ins, too.
While it might not know how to design a homepage, Facebook definitely made the right call here. We here at Switched have at least two recently deceased friends whose Facebook pages are still up, and part of the grieving process definitely involved posting personal memories, anecdotes and other tributes on our late friends' Facebook walls.
It's comforting to know our profile will be maintained once we've gone to the other side. Best of all, we won't have to worry about those stupid application requests. [From: The Facebook Blog and CNET News, via Boing Boing]
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
reginale said 4:12PM on 10-27-2009
Agree, good call on their part.
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jennjenn2286 said 4:13PM on 10-27-2009
Maybe these pages will not be suggested as friends to people? Not everyone likes to be reminded that they have lost someone. Not to ignore the fact but simply to make grieving a little easier. I know of quite a few people who have 'suggested friends' up on their pages, and these suggestions are people who have passed away. Hopefully that will change.
And i know my first thought when i think of my affairs being in order is...'omg, what will happen to my facebook page!'
Seriously!?!?!?!
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steelbluetiger said 4:29PM on 10-27-2009
Amen. I've lost a great number of friends over the past few years. This year alone I said good bye to two more. When Levi died it was comforting to know how many people loved him and that nothing is going to happen to any of the deceased users' profiles. I use to think erasing their profiles three months after death wasnt fair to the survivors. As if erasing them from our hearts and minds, but that is gone from sight shall be removed from our hearts and its great to know that the memories of those that have gone on before us will live on forever.
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Jim Coughlin said 4:29PM on 10-27-2009
Facebook just gave the world "The book of faces"! Excellent!
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blondie12888 said 7:21PM on 10-27-2009
I definitely agree 100% with this. Especially with the latest app, "Reconnect with....(person's name)" it has been really hard to see that pop up with two of my friends who have passed away.
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cinnamonapplejax said 4:44PM on 10-27-2009
wow. so someone dies nd all u think about is what to do with theyr facebook page? i mean, its a good idea nd all but really.
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jackie said 4:49PM on 10-27-2009
i hate the new way of facebook they need to stop changein it i have facebook for 4 years now i like they way when it 1st started
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bowhuntress2002 said 4:55PM on 10-27-2009
what does this have to do w/them memorializing dead members pages?
Colleen said 3:37PM on 10-28-2009
I agree! While I also think that this idea FB has with friends who've passed on, I think their "new format" totally blows. So yes, her comments are relavant.
iiqtkimii said 11:25AM on 10-28-2009
Having just lost a long-time family friend on Saturday, this is a comforting feature that Facebook is offering. Anyone who has ever lost a loved one - be it a relative, friend or even a pet - we all know that the grieving process is cathartic. Being able to continue to remember the person often helps with moving on. Good job Facebook - I knew there was a reason I converted from Myspace...
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Rhonda said 4:59PM on 10-27-2009
I know Facebook is trying to get people to feel warm and fuzzy about all the changes to the new screwed up format, but it still sucks big time. They have managed to make a simple tool become overcomplicated. Bad job facebook.
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rockonxox said 5:29PM on 10-27-2009
I'm hoping this will keep the persons profile from popping up all the time? A guy I was hanging out with and interested in passed away this August and just yesterday facebook had a little note in the corner saying "Reconnect with ____ by sending him a message". That was definitely not helpful in the grieving process and sent me to tears.
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Bunnyhut113 said 5:31PM on 10-27-2009
Please Give me back my old FaceBook !!!!!
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gnm4321 said 10:38AM on 10-28-2009
I lost my wife last April 13,2008 after15 years of marriage. The following September, five months later I thought to create a profile for her (posting both her maiden name and married name) so long lost friends could see what had become of her. I don't even have a face book page! Just seeing my family and her friends on her page has helped give me some closure and has brought a smile to my face more then once seeing pictures of her at her best. Sadly she took her own life, though I'm sure is somewhere smiling too, knowing that she lives on with loved ones in their everyday life.
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caitydid1017 said 5:47PM on 10-27-2009
Thats so sad. :( I'm sorry for your family's and your loss... All my best wishes for you.
emihay said 12:10AM on 10-28-2009
I was truly touched by your comment you made.
It actually brought me to tears as my boyfriend and I read what you had written.
It sounded as if you really and truly loved her, i'm so sorry you had to experience a loss like that and I hope you are doing better with time.
Alysha said 2:16AM on 10-28-2009
This is very sad and my heart goes out to you. I've lost someone who took their own life, he was my brother-in-law. It's never easy even years after the fact. I'm glad that facebook has made it easier for you.
Peggy said 5:51PM on 10-27-2009
Very good idea!! Big Thumbs Up to Facebook!!
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Holly said 12:47PM on 10-29-2009
Great Job face book!
People all grieve differently and some people actually do like having this as an option.
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Pearlsofwisdom said 6:29PM on 10-27-2009
I think the new feed stinks it should be removed there should be a way when your on to hide so if you want to do something ore play games so that people cant chat with you
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