10 Fashions You'll Never See at Fashion Week (Geek Chic)
While you'd be hard pressed to find the latest styles of sneakers and hoodies adorning the pages of Vogue, that's not to say fashion designers don't think about the geeks out there. (We're being polite: this means you.) So to aid with your back-to-school sartorial choices, we came up with our own geek-centric fashion picks for the season. We think you'll find them fabulous.
1) iPhone earrings
While the science is still out, we're fairly certain the iPhone has aphrodisiacal powers over that portion of the population that uses terms like "multitouch" and "internal storage" without smirking double-entendre. Ladies: consider these the female equivalent of Ron Burgundy's Sex Panther.
2) PlayStation cufflinks
You could roll to the next prom, wedding, or whatever type of black tie affair you tend to frequent, wearing the plain-Jane black cufflink studs like the rest of the crowd. Or you could step up and fly your geek flag proud by flaunting these sterling silver badboys. It all depends on your mojo: Are you a sheep, or a wolf?
3) McFly Sneakers
Originally dubbed the McFly 2015, Nike created these limited edition kicks as an homage to the patron saint of geeks-gone-good, Marty Jr. (For clueless young'uns, get thee to Netflix and watch 'Back to the Future.' Now.) Since only 100 were put out, you'll need to hit eBay -- and pop down a few hundies -- for your chance to show up the skinny-jean crowd.
The holy grail of geek-bait hotness, this custom-made costume is all win, for all parties involved: Wear it, you're awesome; see someone wearing it, you're psyched; give it to your own personal Princess Leia, you're living the dream, friend. George Lucas is officially forgiven.
Geeks are notorious for choosing function over fashion, but these DIY keyboard pants are completely lacking in either -- only one side of keys apparently works. But if you want to solidify your social ostracism, head to Hack-A-Day for instructions.
Long before the swine flu terrorized us all, America suffered the ravages of the deadly addictive Pac-Man Fever. And like all things '80s, it's apparently back, as evinced by this absurdly useless but awesome chapeau. Somewhat like the bizarro image of that other '80s throwback, Nuprin, it's big, it's yellow, and it's certainly different. We'd call it geekdom personified.
7) Nintendo Purse
Another DIY project for the dreamers out there, this purse won't win any beauty contests, but it ensures your favorite ladygeek won't suffer gaming withdrawals when she steps out of the house and away from her Nintendo. And, uh, 1988.
8) Wi-Fi T-Shirt
While ostensibly a graphic, functioning Wi-Fi detector for finding the nearest Internet hotspot, these T-shirts are also geek-detectors. Or maybe they're geek-attractants? Either way, besides their functional value, they're stylish and sort of serve the same purpose as those little Jesus fish that Christians put on their car -- wear one, and your clan will find you.
9) Periodic Table Ring
To paraphrase what the poet once said, it's essential to keep your pimp hand strong. In the geek world, you'd get a nice head start wearing one of these absolutely pimpin' rings. Made of the element shown on their face -- they're available in silver, gold or platinum -- these rings boldly say to onlookers, "I know the periodic chart, and oh, by the way, I have a ton of cash to burn, too."
10) Molecule Tattoo
Once the preserve of edgy musicians and roughneck bikers, tattoos are so thoroughly mainstream that it's a struggle to find one that stands out anymore. Unless you go the geek-core route and get your ink-spiration out of your favorite textbook. Think of it as an expression of your individuality, and a very limited cheat sheet for the guy who sits behind you.