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New Game Has One Strategy: Shoot People Directly in the Face

by Warren Riddle on April 9, 2009 at 04:02 PM


Do you enjoy first-person shooter games, but get annoyed by actually having to play the game, instead of effortlessly dealing out death and destruction? Then, read on, fellow animated death mongers. Parody news site The Onion has a new game to help satiate your thirst for simulated blood and brain matter.

Granted, 1PS (first person shooter) games, such as 'Call of Duty,' are awesome, but they're typically really, really hard. Even on the 'Easy' setting, it's incredibly difficult to run headlong into enemy forces, trying to vanquish and demoralize your opponents solely with point-blank head shots. Some of us lack the patience, or possibly the skill, to systematically snipe out opposing combatants, or to stealthily infiltrate areas behind enemy lines. But a groundbreaking new game, called 'Close Range,' changes that dynamic completely.

Gameplay involves only one button, the space bar, which you press to fire your weapon whenever a character's face appears directly in front of your gun. That's right; the game requires no aiming, or moving at all, for that matter. So, if you're too lazy to painstakingly defeat enemies through proper strategies, or you just enjoy exploding heads, check out this Peabody-worthy preview, from the Onion News Team. If you're sufficiently intrigued, you can play a demo right here. But, since this is from The Onion, if you're expecting an actual game to hit the shelves, we wouldn't suggest you get your hopes up. [From: Close Range Via: The Onion]

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Tags: first person shooter, FirstPersonShooter, funny, humor, parody, satire, the onion, TheOnion, video game violence, VideoGameViolence

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