New Frontiers in Etiquette: High School Photos, Tagging and Facebook
In the past, we've discussed the evolution of tech etiquette, being sure to address the frontier of Facebook politesse. After reading a recent op-ed piece on Slate.com, though, we've had one particularly prickly Facebook phenomenon on our minds: tagging pictures.
Facebook user and Slate contributor Brian Braiker asserts that he is not what he calls a "digital native," one of those who have grown up in the Internet-age and whose ideas of privacy and identity demonstrate that fact. That explains why, after an old friend tagged him in a scanned image of an embarrassing high school photo, Braiker described the situation, thusly: "I felt violated."
Braiker goes on to characterize his reaction to this increasingly common occurrence as typical among folks of his generation, those who readily adopt sites like Facebook but have difficulties in reckoning with their social implications.
We here at Switched span those generations; some of us are Braiker's age or older, and some are what he would call "digital natives" (although we cringe at the term; we were all born in a place, not the Internet). Those age differences -- however slight -- do seem to make a significant difference in our attitudes toward the topic.
"I'm very hard to embarrass," said one 26-year-old Switched contributor.
That being said, his Facebook friends have posted pictures from which he's been tempted to de-tag himself. "I seriously consider it," he says, "all the time." But he never has. Deliberating on his reasoning, he finally concludes, "I guess I'm partially afraid of offending the people who tagged me."
Another contributor, 38, takes a different stance. When asked if he would de-tag an embarrassing picture, he quickly responded, "Yes. Without a doubt, I would de-tag it."
"As best I can," he continued, "I want to be the one who manages my public image, to the extent I have one."
It is that very line -- between public and private -- that becomes hazy on social networking sites. And, if those sites' popularity is any indication (along with that of reality shows and more intimate services like Twitter), it will only become hazier. Regardless of when we were born, or how tech-savvy we are, that line will surely be an increasingly difficult one to walk.
Facebook Crime and Punishment
Blackmail
Sending any personal info or incriminating pictures to someone on Facebook is a huge mistake for many reasons. One of the worst possible outcomes is getting blackmailed for money, sex, or, well, anything these sickos dream up. Really, whether they're using a fake profile or not, it's a horrible idea. Read up on the story of an 18-year-old who blackmailed 31 male classmates after he posed as a girl and asked for nude pictures. That's lesson enough.
Impostors
Sure, it can be harmless to impersonate a celeb online or create a fake profile for a movie character. But seriously, there's a definite line you shouldn't cross when pretending to be someone else and it can lead to dire consequences for you. Maybe it's not as extreme as the Moroccan man who was jailed for 43 days after creating a fake Facebook profile of a prince, but you never know. Just steer clear of it.
Self-Incrimination
Do we really have to explain this? Just look up the shoplifter who posed with her stolen merchandise, the many photos of drunk underage teens, and, most recently, the album featuring a couple who killed and ate an endangered iguana in the Bahamas.
Suicide
Social networking sites has been blamed for a lot of things, fairly and unfairly, but in our opinion, the worst offense has been their indirect involvement in suicides. Obviously, there are a lot of factors responsible in each case, but there does seem to be links between social networking and a rash of suicides, and obviously tehre's the case tragic of Megan Meier, who killed herself after a classmate's mom impersonated a teen boy and harassed her over Myspace.
Murder
We've reported on numerous incidents of people getting in trouble because of their online behavior. Now, people are becoming victims because of what they're doing on the Web too. In England, a man was convicted of murdering his estranged wife after she changed her relationship status to "single." So, be careful of who can see your profile and what you're doing, no matter how harmless it seems.
Nigerian Scammers
Oh, you thought this only happened via poorly worded emails, right? WRONG. Once people got wise to their old ways, these con men are turning to social networking sites for new targets. This time, they're hacking into people's accounts and impersonating them to ask for money, usually with some weird sob story. You can check out a transcript of one of these conversations here.
Cooperation
Even if the law isn't on a case, a victim, his friends, or empathetic strangers might be. Since it's easy to get word out for anything online, people are using blogs, forums, and social networking sites to help track down criminals. In one such case, a vehicle thief was tracked down by a bunch of anonymous car enthusiasts after the victim posted his story on a forum. In the end, they identified the guy through his Facebook profile.
Self-Incrimination
Do we really have to explain this? Just look up the shoplifter who posed with her stolen merchandise, the many photos of drunk underage teens, and, most recently, the album featuring a couple who killed and ate an endangered iguana in the Bahamas.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Sean Payne said 2:38PM on 3-12-2009
I think a good way around this problem is that if social networks that allowed picture tagging would not tag the user until the user that confirms the tagging. Its a relatively simple solution IMHO.
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Sean Payne said 2:41PM on 3-12-2009
Wow, I've got horrible grammar. What I meant was this:
A user tagging the picture would post and tag another user, but that tag wouldn't show up publicly until the user that was tagged confirms the tag (either as a private, friends-only, public, etc. permission).
Rebecca said 4:05PM on 3-14-2009
You do get approval of tagged photos on My Space, but not on Facebook. I have been tagged in a few photos where I don't like the way I look, but I won't be vain enough to un-tag them.
Grandmakitty said 7:23PM on 3-14-2009
Bravo - no explanation needed.
They ask if you want to validate "friends"
They permit you to delete "friends" you no longer wish to have.
Why not ask the person if they wish that photo - or tag - or both to be published?
Grandmakitty
Lynne said 3:03PM on 3-12-2009
Sean,
What a chuckle, correcting your own post. Almost like arguing w/ yourself.
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Kitty said 2:27PM on 3-14-2009
Ya, Sean, I think that is actually a brilliant idea. Not sure why they haven't thought to do that. I mean, you have to wait for a friend to confirm you, then confirm how you know each other. If you say you are in a relationship with somebody, they have to confirm it before it shows up on your page that way...I think tagging pics DEF should be the same way. What if someone tagged someone as someone else, someone that another person had a beef with but didn't know what they looked like? In this day and age that could happen. Think of what that might lead to... but I would never hesitate to untag myself if I thought I needed to. If the tagger's feelings get hurt, they don't need to be on your friends list, huh?
I personally don't care, as far as being embarrased. If I were thin skinned I wouldn't even use Facebook or Myspace, or anything like that. Personally, I'm sick of these Facebook articles. Not sure why I read them. It gives way too much emphasis on something that is supposed to be an entertaining past time, but is now gaining the status of life or death. Half the time I don't even think of some feature on FB as worrisome, until I see some alarming headline ...like a dummy i follow it just in case it's important...
I use Facebook as an outlet, and a fun way to keep up with friends I can't see everyday. Why cant everyone else???
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Leslie said 2:35PM on 3-14-2009
I think if you post photo's or blogs about yourself and your not trying to hide anything and they are showing or telling you in the true way it shouldn't make any difference. If someone wants to termimate or not hire you based on your internet profile as long as it shows you in your true life and doesn't show you nude or smoking pot or something like that isn't that discriminating on their part.
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Rich said 3:26PM on 3-14-2009
Imagine if someone was in a witness protection program and they were tagged with thier real name....could be some seriose complications as well as legal issue for Facebook. They {facebook} should resolve this problem ASAP for many reasons.
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Lynn said 5:18PM on 3-14-2009
I had someone untag a picture of themself recently.The picture was not offensive or in bad taste-she just felt she "looked fat". I was not upset at all that she "untagged" it. However, she also asked me to never post a picture of her on Facebook in the future. That I would not agree to. Only my friends and family view these photos and anyone else wouldn't care anyway. I see it the same as showing people my photo albums. I wouldn't think of asking someone permission before doing that either. Nor would I expect someone taking a picture of me to ask before sharing it. Once I take a picture, that picture becomes my property to use at my discretion. I wouldn't post a picture to purposely hurt or embarrass anyone. Once someone takes your picture you don't know where it will end up. The solution? Don't be on the wrong end of the camera! A note-this person is the first to pose when a camera is out. I also agree that Facebook could easily require you to confirm before being tagged. However, that wouldn't stop the pic from being posted-just you from knowing that it was.
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Kathryne said 7:59PM on 3-14-2009
Just an FYI . . . it only becomes your photo to use at your discretion with a signed waiver from the person or persons in the photo. Otherwise they can tell you to take their images down and if you don't they can ask the site to or go a legal route.
dave said 5:34PM on 3-14-2009
Yeah this has become a problem. I've had to ask a few friends to not tag me or post pics of me without my permission. You have to realize employers look thru these things to see what kind of person they are hiring....alot of it would turn off a perspective employer
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Kathryne said 7:59PM on 3-14-2009
I've had a similar issue. I take lots of photos and share them in my profiles on MySpace and FaceBook. My aunt helped herself to a few of my albums and didn't credit my photos on her page. I think that certain rules should be obeyed and not taking someone else's photos from their page or not making sure it's okay to post photos of someone else or not getting permission to tag someone even if it's okay to post their image . . . well, those things just shouldn't happen.
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ann said 9:23PM on 3-14-2009
Regarding Daves post, if you are doing things that you dont want to be publicly known, maybe you should rethink the reasoning behind why you are paarticipating in those activities in the first place. Just because the employer doesnt see it in a facebook, myspace or linkedin page doesnt mean they wont eventually see the forest for the trees either.
I wouldnt put anything up on a webpage that could be construed as a negative anyway...but thats just me.
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kike4me said 2:22PM on 3-16-2009
yes, i think facebook really need to work on getting one's permission before been tagged. Also wondering if it's possible to kind of do away with someone you no longer want on your friend list.
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chico said 9:32PM on 3-14-2009
Could some one explain to me about the tag picture and the de-tag, i am a little old fashion still living in the pre-historic time, please some one IM or E-MAIL me and explain to me all of that,i dont even know how to post a pic please show me, now that the internet had reach me all the way to my cave need to know more, ok people i got to go back to my cave hope to hear from you soon.
a cave man with a lap-top
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Jonathan said 7:58PM on 3-15-2009
Here's a good way around tags on embarrassing photo's: If you don't want anybody to know you did it ... DON'T DO IT! I don't think tagging is the problem I think the real problem is a lack of personal responsibility for your own actions.
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Marie said 8:12PM on 3-14-2009
I'm a private person. This article opened my eyes. It never occurred to me that people could end up "defamed" on someone else's facebook page.
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Jackie said 8:39PM on 3-14-2009
FaceBook and MySpace leads to stalkers, plain and simple. Heck, when you think about it, googling The White Pages can even give a stalker directions to your home. Isn't that just dandy?
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Danny said 4:17AM on 3-17-2009
I rather be tagged in a drunk pic than as a cartoon character or a Pokemon monster. See http://reface.me if don't know what I'm talking about.
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