Five Online Daters To Avoid (3)
3. Fixer-Uppers
Most marriages end in divorce -- that's just a fact of life. But many people on the rebound make their profiles all about what they don't want. The truth is, these people are on the rebound and are likely to still be living with the wounds of their last relationship. You may be in for some serious scrutiny, criticism, and baggage-handling, so beware. Imagine, for example, what any of Sir Paul McCartney's new lovers must think as he talks about his past relationships!
Consider these recent profile headlines:
• Cheaters Need Not Apply
• Tired of Meeting Women in Bars
• No Manipulative B*thces, please!
• Please Don't Be A Liar
• Felons, potheads and jerks need not apply
What we have here are jilted lovers. Run. Run away. While it's a good idea to learn from your past relationships, no one wants to date a bitter, angry person. By telling people what you don't want, you're scaring off potential mates.
On the other side, if you're reading profiles, avoid these singles as they are either recently out of relationships or still getting over something pretty big. They're not ready, and you don't want to be their fixer-upper.
How to avoid them:
To steer clear of the fixer-upper at all costs, watch out for the aforementioned profile headlines. While you may hate the same things these rebounders do, you still shouldn't pursue a relationship with them. Having something in common can be great, but those things should be positive, not negative. As the old saying goes,"You must love yourself before you love another...."
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)
wikkedchik said 3:02PM on 10-10-2007
Not all fix-ups end in disaster.
I had just gotten out of a relationship and was fixed up with my best friends husbands best friend (yeah thats a mouthful).
Needless to say, we're still together and getting married next fall.
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larry said 3:17PM on 10-10-2007
Why would anyone want to meet someone on-line..Hard enough meeting someone nice in person.
Remember these words Nothing,Nothing ,Nothing is forever.. EXCEPT your children. Relationships,finance,health..It all changes !!!!
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Micky said 3:40PM on 10-10-2007
wikkedchik: Congrats! Good for you!
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feeb said 4:03PM on 10-10-2007
I wouldn't say that, my parents are still together.
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lmqlo said 4:36PM on 10-10-2007
The best thing about marriage is...DIVORCE!
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Felicita said 5:08PM on 10-10-2007
I have met nothing but liars on match.com.
After 4 month of meeting nothing but loosers and liars, I decided to cancel my cancle my account.
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Chris said 5:25PM on 10-10-2007
Hey Felicita, hate to break it to you, but losers usually attract other losers. Maybe if you learn how to spell "loser" you could efficiently dodge them and hook an educated person.
On second thought, you're probably cursed for a life with losers.
Online dating rules, but it's not for everybody. If you haven't been lucky in meeting people off line, the odds are you won't be lucky online either.
Cheers!
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Demolition said 5:36PM on 10-10-2007
Ain't it the truth! A fixer-upper already has the perception that someone else will screw them too. So if you are into salvage, odds are against you. Whenever I read one of those profile headlines, I already know how their last relationship ended.
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Janice said 5:46PM on 10-10-2007
If people are patient things will work out eventually,weather online or offline. I believe in love.
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Christy said 5:57PM on 10-10-2007
I was single for 12 years before meeting someone special online. I didn't meet him on a dating site, on a singles site, or in a chat room. I met him on a message board for people that love Stephen King books. I wasn't looking for a boyfriend, but there was something special about him. We were online friends for over a year before we began IMing each other. About 6 months later, he asked me for my phone number. I gave him my work number, (I own my own business,) and after talking to him three times, I accepted his phone number. We did the long distance talking on the phone on the weekends thing for 8 months before he flew out from New Jersey to Colorado for our first meeting. The sparks were there, and after a long distance relationship that lasted 2 years, he moved to Colorado. A year later we got married, and just celebrated our third anniversary. If you'd told me 7 years ago that I would meet my husband online, I'd've looked at you like you had 2 heads. Online dating isn't for everyone, to be sure, but online dating led me to my Mr. Right, and thank God for it.
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Fiona Mackenzie said 5:58PM on 10-10-2007
Her mistake--if there was one--was taking up with someone heading for Dubai. Since Dubai City was established as a tax-free extradition-free haven for rich liars and criminals, she might have foreseen that he was one or the other or both.
On the other hand, she may have spent a TON of money and had a blast in the city that's Disneyland for adults, for 11 opulent, party-filled months. Not a bad way to spend a year of your life.
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Ty said 6:46PM on 10-10-2007
UH hummmm ,,Just because someone states what they dont want is not a bad thing (gold diggers need not apply) Hey,, tell them what your not in the market for,,,( if you were in that market then you`d be on sugar daddy .com) tired of "needy" people,,a relationship is effort from BOTH parties invloved,,,,Sorry I`m a very HONEST person,,
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lindatphxaz said 7:06PM on 10-10-2007
Hi there!!
In June of 05, my niece created a profile for me. I told her that I didn't need help from the internet to date. She told me, "No, tia. You can just have friends." So, I agreed.
I was on there and made "friends", 750 of them. There was this one man that stood out though. We emailed and talked on the phone for 6 months before we finally decided to meet. We met, and next month will be our 2nd year anniversary. We have talked of marriage, but are just taking it slowly. I just met his daughter in April of this year and he met my 2 kids last year in August. Just taking it slowwwwwwwly.
With that said, I was NOT looking to use the internet to date, but it just happened that that is where I met my handsome man.
'Linda :-)
PS..I'm glad that everything that he wrote about himself was true. Even up to his picture...
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karwin said 7:28PM on 10-10-2007
I met my Fiance on Match.com. It was the best thing I ever did. We are getting married in March.
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Bruce said 9:03PM on 10-10-2007
I was single for 10 years after a divorce. The only way I met women was online, and I loved it. Heck, I could go meet people without actually leaving the house. I dated for many years. I met my wife (now of 5 years)online as she answered an add on Love @ AOL, and things only get better and better.
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msevike said 9:17PM on 10-10-2007
Hey Chris...
Well put!! If someone bitches too much they need to take a look in the mirror and see the reason why...lol!!!
Inline dating is with the same pitfalls as someone you meet at the market or club...The difference is that you have a little amt. of control who approaches you verses in person.
Good luck to all of us singles!! Happy Hunting!
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msevike said 9:18PM on 10-10-2007
Opps, a quick correction...that was ONLINE dating that I meant before, not INLINE..
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npf said 2:36AM on 10-11-2007
CRISTY IS ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. I even met my life time partner thru internet. I was NOT looking to use the internet to date, but it just happened that that is where I met my handsome man so with his picture. lol ! he is cute anyway. Honestly its not important. IMPORTANT is HE, who and what he is, the inner beauty of a person- nobodys perfect and nothings is permanent in this whole universe. Folks I would say its KINDA sort of LUCK and GODs Blessings to find a PARTNER thru ONLINE well, not much thing to say about this except I wont stop thanking GOD for giving me a REAL FRIEND and LIFE TIME PARTNER at the same time.THINK--WE LIVE ONLY ONCE why NOT MAKE THE BEST OF IT! Good Luck ladies and GoD Bless you all !!!
npf
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CARL said 10:45AM on 10-11-2007
In my 50's I tired of being unable to find someone without a string of baggage, so I went online to AsiaFriendFinders and began chatting with Asian women. I was upfront with my profile. I didn't want anyone who needed to have children because I didn't want to start a family so late. I found one lovely lady in her early 30's. We had computer cams and voice, and we 'dated' for about 6 months. We had a wonderful time. I went to China and married her. Stupid? Not at all. She is now here in USA with me, and has been for 2 years. We have a true love that is real and dynamic. This was the best decision I ever made. There is no question that we each found our soulmate. My life is blessed, and new blessings are a normal part of our life together. ... Carl
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jimmy said 5:29PM on 10-18-2007
Online dating is full of deception and the people who perpetrate these frauds are from all over the world. Especially Nigeria have been contacted by these women who post a photo they get off the web and it is usually a beautiful looking girl who in no way represents the real person who is in a hotel room in nigeria and they may go as far as sending suggestive pictures the way to root these folks out is to pay attention to the spelling and grammar as they are usually from these places they operate out of. That being said Its my experience to trust no one.
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